Dominic Monaghan says he was ‘devastated’ by Evangeline Lilly breakup: ‘The first time in my life that I was all in’
Dominic Monaghan is opening up about his heartbreak and sobriety.
In an interview with Anna Faris for her podcast Unqualified, the Lost alum, 45, discusses his split from co-star Evangeline Lilly, 43, saying he discovered she cheated on him while the two were filming the hit series, which aired from 2004 to 2010, in Hawaii.
“I’ve only ever had my heart broken once,” the British actor began. “I was dating an actress on Lost named Evangeline Lilly, who has since gone on to have her own name.” And, you know, I’m not sure how she would explain the story, but from my perspective, it was probably the first time in my life that I was completely immersed.”
The Lord of the Rings actor dated Lilly from 2004 to 2007, before splitting up.
Monaghan admitted that he and Lilly were “exploring” the idea of children and marriage at the time, but he was also battling his own demons, including a heavy drug and alcohol addiction, which didn’t sit well with Lilly as their relationship grew more serious.
“I was always the guy who desired more. I was always wanting to drink more, take more, stay up late, and go on benders. “And I just assumed she was fine with it,” he explained. “I think she was probably constantly exploring the idea of, ‘Well, this is OK for a while, but he’s not going to be a great dad or a great husband because he’s got all this work to do,’ which I certainly did.””
“I think she was looking around to see what else was an option,” he continued, “and unfortunately, there was a little bit of a crossover, which was pretty upsetting for me.” “It just kind of blew up in my face.
“It exploded in my face in an awful way because not only do you go through a public breakup, but that TV show Lost was kind of a big deal around the world at the time, so it was kind of known that we were together and then known that we weren’t together.”
While the couple didn’t explicitly address their split at the time, Monaghan admitted to cheating on him in a 2013 tweet in response to a message that read, “Evangeline looked unreal in The Hobbit, man oh man, “”Nah,” he writes. I don’t date liars.”
Monaghan elaborated on the experience to Faris, explaining that while they were still filming Lost, someone informed him that Lily was cheating on him with someone else.
“To say I was devastated would be an understatement,” he admitted. “When we were together, I had to be told by a third party, ‘You do realise she’s with this guy,'” she said. ‘Wait, what?’ I thought. “And this person said, ‘Yeah.'”
“I genuinely believe they were attempting to assist,” he said of the messenger, whom he did not name. “They were simply saying, ‘You don’t have all of the facts, and we do.'” And there’s a chance that the entire island of Oahu is laughing at you. ‘Oh, well, thank you for the transparency,’ I thought.”
The Lost crew “filmed in every location, every beach” on the Hawaiian island of Oahu, according to the actor, so there was no escaping the rumours. “I just felt like, oh, so the entire film crew knew and was keeping a secret for her,” he said. “And I’d just show up and be like a monkey’s asshole.”
But there is a silver lining. While the experience was traumatic, Monaghan claims it provided him with the motivation he needed to straighten himself out.
“I’ve broken up with girls before and thought, ‘Well, she’s a lovely person, but it was never going to work.’ It was never going to work. “There were some things that weren’t going to work out,” he admitted. “But when I was with Evie, I was like, ‘This is fine.'” We’ll figure out the little things that we’re working on. And we will make lovely shapes with each other for all eternity.’
“Losing that potential was heartbreaking, but it also helped shape who I am today. So I’m overjoyed that it all happened “He continued.
That clarity, he explains, opened up new perspectives on love and the future.
“It’s probably the number one thing in my life that I’m most positive about,” he said of his relationship with love. “And I challenge a lot of people not to lose hope and not to feel like everything is messed up.”
“You can be cynical about money and mindful about who you spend your time with and other such things, but when it comes to love, you just have to kind of surrender and see what happens.” “He continued. “And, you know, another thing about love is that I want it to be effortless. I don’t want to work on it. You’ll work later when there’s a mortgage to pay, bills to pay, and arguments to resolve.”
Monaghan hasn’t given up hope on falling in love. “I want it to sweep me off my feet, overwhelm me, and be beautiful,” he says.